Weddings At Saint Mary's: Frequently Asked Questions
One of us is Christian and the other comes from another faith tradition. Can we be married at Saint Mary’s?
Interfaith marriages require particular care and counsel. If a couple is considering such a marriage, they should seek the counsel of their religious leaders long before attempting to plan a marriage service. Questions regarding relatives, the upbringing of children (if this is desired) and plans for the observance of religious holy days should be discussed thoroughly. If the priest at Saint Mary’s is confident that the couple can continue to express their faiths while fulfilling the expectations of Christian marriage, then the priest will be glad to officiate at such a wedding.
Does Saint Mary’s permit divorced persons to marry?
Yes. The Gospel is not about punishing people for their pasts, but about inviting them to new life in Christ. However, it is necessary that before moving ahead, there should be an honest assessment of the past with an eye toward growing toward the future. In the Episcopal Church, the officiating priest applies to the bishop of the diocese to request permission to re-marry. The purpose of this application is to ascertain the intention of the couple with regard to their relationship to the Church, that the Bishop might give his consent in good conscience. For information, a copy of the form can be found at http://www.dioceseny.org/index.cfm?Action=AboutUs.FormsWeUse
Who can serve as an officiating minister at a wedding at Saint Mary’s?
Normally, only a priest on staff at Saint Mary’s officiates at a wedding that is held in the church. If there is a guest priest the couple would like to involve, this should be discussed with the officiating Saint Mary’s priest at the very beginning of the planning.
Can we include family and friends in the wedding?
It is most appropriate for family and friends to participate in the wedding by reading one of the Lessons from Scripture or leading a portion of the prayers. Non-scriptural readings are not used, nor are musicians who are not associated with Saint Mary’s. Most couples find that by keeping the number of ushers, groomsmen, bridesmaids and other attendants to a minimum, a kind of dignity and solemnity is preserved for the occasion.
Does the church require pre-marriage counseling?
Yes. When a couple makes a commitment to be married at Saint Mary’s the wedding date is established and reserved. Shortly thereafter the officiating priest will contact the couple to arrange for counseling, which will vary in number and frequency according to the couple. Sometimes it is appropriate for the priest to recommend a therapist or other counselor for the couple.
Is the Holy Eucharist always included in a marriage at Saint Mary’s?
The normal form for Holy Matrimony includes the Holy Eucharist. Saint Mary’s welcomes all baptized Christians to participate in the Holy Eucharist, regardless of religious affiliation. Those who are not baptized Christians often come forward to receive a blessing from the priest. If there are compelling reasons, the marriage ceremony can be conducted without the Eucharist.
How long is the typical wedding at Saint Mary’s?
The typical wedding, including the Holy Eucharist, usually lasts just under one hour. Music, if selected, will naturally lengthen a service.
Is there parking available near the church?
The church has no parking of its own, though there are commercial parking garages on 46th Street and on 47th Street. Public
transportation is the best method for guests to arrive. If the bride or another part of the wedding party plans to arrive by limousine, special care should be taken to plan for traffic congestion in Midtown.
Does the church have facilities for a reception following the service?
Yes. Saint Joseph’s Hall, the room adjoining the church, and its kitchen can be rented in addition to the church space. Saint Mary’s can recommend a caterer who is accustomed to the space. No smoking is allowed in the building. Alcoholic beverages are allowed.